Interview of Mr Bottle

This is an interview of Mr Bottle by The Asian Parents

Getting to know you as a professional magician:

- Please tell us a bit about yourself, and your career. How and when did you decide to choose this career path? 

I am a full-time profession magician and party planner as well as a father of 3. I was interested in magic since I was about 5 years old because I was amazed when my father did simple tricks. I wanted to learn magic then but it was difficult! There was no internet and hardly any publication on magic was sold in Singapore. I am probably not the best candidate for magic because I was really shy.

The journey to learn magic difficult, luckily I was able to find some books in the library along the way. I would write down word for word, draw picture for picture, magic which I liked from the books so I would still remember them after I returned them. As you can see, my interest in magic never falter, I didn’t give up despite the lack of resources!

My turning point when it was joined International Brotherhood of Magicians (IBM) Singapore Ring 115 at about 17 years old. There were a lot of magicians helping me and the meetings opened my eyes to so much more magic, from books, to videos to magic shops, than I ever knew.

I did shows for the IBM and charity shows as well. A gentleman, whom I volunteered together with at an old folks’ home, engaged me to do a show at an RC event and that was my first paid show!

Since I love children, so I naturally went into performing magic for children. The more I performed for kids, the more I love it! I like the laughter I receive from the kids, and I learned so much from them when I talk to them.

Doing children birthday parties worked great for me, and being the businessman in me, I reacted to the demands of the market. I was getting requests for other related services like balloon sculpting, facepainting, games, etc. so I started training part time staff to do those and partnered up with peers in industry; I was probably the one of the first to provide an one-stop entertainment services in the market and was very successful. I created Mr Bottle’s Kids Party and produced shows like Science Shows infused in magic, which was the first in Singapore. We have since opened up in Mr Bottle’s Kids Party in Taiwan and China (closed due to covid-19) and produced theatre shows. 

- Were you supported by your friends and family in this decision? 

My parents thought it would be better if I were to do magic part-time as they were worried that it would not make a viable career. I was very focused then, and would spend all my energy to make my passion work and hence I went fully into it. 

A lot of my peers are earning much more than me now in their corporate jobs but to me, my career choice has been very fulfilling and I never regretted making this move.

My wife is very supportive of my career and that was how we met: at her niece’s birthday party. I needed a violinist for a gig and she happened to be an accomplished one, performing at celebrities concerts occasionally.

- What do your children think of your career?

They love it! I have been organising their parties, performing at their birthday parties and teaching them magic. They are rather reserved like me when I was a kid. Magic has helped them tremendously to grow in confidence and in learning important values like resilience, respect and empathy.

- Why and when did you start your travel blog? Is that an extension of your work? How do you view it? 

I love travelling and get invited overseas about twice every year to perform my magic. I wanted to document my travels hence I started Magical Travel Journal long time ago. For instance, when I was invited to Pyongyang to perform, I naturally want to pen this down as a memory since it was on my bucket list to travel there. 

Since I was busy with my business, the updates were rather infrequent and I could do them only when I had the time. 

It was when covid-19 struck, and most of my gigs disappeared. I had a 90% drop in my income despite pivoting to virtual magic shows and bringing our decorations and party items into e-commerce platforms.

Since I had just took up a course on Instagram, I decided to put it to good use by starting a travel Instagram account. That is also when I started to write more on the my travel blog.

I had the idea of making a tour kids-friendly more than a decade ago but emails to outbound tour companies were ignored then. I decided to try my luck again and this time a local tour operator took up my idea and I launched the Magical Balestier Walking Tour.

A lot of what you read in my travel blog are also bedtime stories for my children who loves adventure stories. I simply incorporate subtle details of these landmarks into the stories so they learn at the same time.

- When did you become a father? What was it like becoming a dad, all three times?  

I became a father in 2011. Whenever each of my child was born, they drove me to do greater things and to leave a legacy. 

For instance, my magic academy was born because of my daughter (first child). I tried to teach her a very simple magic trick at 13 months. I was not surprised that she could do the ‘magic’. What amazed me was that she could reset the props all by herself after watching me do it a few times. I realised that the learning ability of babies and children are limitless. At that time, I discovered magic was a valuable tool to nurture creativity and fun during learning. Thus, my wife pushed me to develop a curriculum in magic to help other children. As my children grow up, I realised that magic is also a great method to teach values, and that is why focusing on life values is a big part in my magic lessons now. 

Another example of how being a father subconsciously opens up new avenues of expressions-my daughter became a bookworm recently. Since writing a book was on my bucket list, the pandemic provided the perfect opportunity for me to start the project. 

Of course, she was one of the first to give me her feedback. I just completed this story to inspire children to believe in themselves and submitted it to a publisher. I am crossing my fingers that they will help me fulfil my dreams of inspiring more people. 

Getting to know you as a doting dad:

- Please share a bit about your parenting journey? 

My sons were born in 2013 and 2018. Luckily, I did not have to be busy with working at parties when my wife gave birth to them as you know deliveries cannot be timed and magician cannot cancel out on a birthday kid at the last minute! I admire my wife on how much she loved our children. We did hypno-birthing and she did not have epidural for all 3 births! 

However, being an entrepreneur means that I have to work 24 hours and 7 days a week- in a way. The advantage is that I could be more flexible with my time. For instance, I may have to finish  a proposal urgently; I will spend my time with them first during the day and work when the children are asleep or in school. 

Before covid-19, my weekends and public holidays were packed so I could not spend much time with them. However, I make it up with other activities on weekdays when venues weren’t as busy!

My wife is also very supportive and she steps up whenever I am busy.  

- How did this journey impact you mentally? What's your advice to men in the process of becoming dads? 

The journey of a dad as well as entrepreneur is not an easy one. Before we gave birth to our first baby, my wife read up on whatever she could about parenting so I never have to worry about making the right decisions. Trust and respect is very important between new parents. We have to remind ourselves that we are both new students at mother- and fatherhood. For me, learning how to be a better dad is a continuous journey and why not make it fruitful and fun at the same time?

I am very clear from the very beginning what I want my company to be. It is about inspiring children. I won’t accept jobs, which go against my philosophy, just because of money. That helps keep me sane. 

Facing my children is rather different from entertaining children at parties when you only interact with them for 3-hour periods. At home, my role shifts from “entertainer” to “boss”, I often have to remind myself that my kids are children after all. While I need to be firm with setting limits, I also have to show them the same kind of fun love that I display for the children at parties.  This is my additional challenge as my children’s friends always find me funnier than their own parents.

- How has being a father changed your life? 

I have gotten busier, in a good way. The first 2 years of each child were super challenging as we have to wake up in the middle of the night to take care of the baby. It was tiring but fulfilling.

Nowadays, part of my job is organising parties for my children without getting paid! But the “customer” satisfaction is priceless.

My dreams and business also develop as they grow up.

- What's a typical day like for you on a weekday?

Before Covid-19, on a weekday I usually go to my office about 2-3 days a week as I had staff. But now my office is closed so I stay at home most of the time.

My wife and I will always make time for each other everyday to eat dinner together. Evening time is usually spent with the children, playing, swimming, reading story, playing chess (my son’s new hobby) or giving riddles.

Since I am not as busy now, I have become their ‘grab driver’ and wake up early to send and pick them up from school.

I cycle more often now (alone and as a couple), exploring different part of Singapore! 

- What do you do on weekends?

Before covid, I was usually busy with my work like parties, regular contracts at hotels and other events. But I make time to have a face-to-face magic lesson every Sunday, which I also teach my children with other participants. (The lesson is still on-going.)

Now that there is less work, we usually spend time at home or occasionally visiting an attraction in Singapore (which you can see on my Travel IG). Sometimes, we will cycle and rollerblade to playgrounds to explore.

- How do you balance your many roles as a father and a professional?

I am blessed to have a job which my kids like. Frequently, I would test a new craft, which we are launching or a magic on them first.

I always make it a point to spend time with my children. As a magician and family event organiser, I am brought to very amazing places around Singapore which I would otherwise not know about. For instance, I saw an Egyptian house in Sentosa Cove and a house with life-size dinosaurs décor so I drove the kids to just see the latter after their enrichment class since we were nearby. I also usually get first-hand news or invites to some of the amazing events. 

I like a little kid, I am seldom tired. Do not give excuses of being tired or busy not to spend time with my family. 

- Please share a bit more about your parenting challenges and struggles and how you overcame them. 

Having 3 kids is quite a handful! It keeps us rather busy but luckily my wife is very capable in juggling her work and we had her parents to help. Before I became a ‘driver’ for the kids, they would help to drive them to school and classes whenever we are busy. 

My son is rather careless and would miss out on his homework frequently. I only found out only during HBL since we were rather hands-off and relaxed over their academic progress. Hence, I decided to set up a routine and system for them to learn. For instance, to ensure that they are paying attention and focusing in class,  they have to write down 3 things they learned in school everyday (whether academic or non-academic). My kids will have to plan 2-3 goals they hope to achieve everyday (except for weekends.)

Although we have a helper a home, they help do simple chores themselves. The youngest is the most helpful and he often volunteers to clean the car and sweep the floor. 

There are many problems they will encounter as they grow up. We hope to nip them in the bud before they happen. For instance, we will discuss current affairs, like the Olympics of how there are winning and losing, and how to deal with them. 

- What's your secret to success?  

I am sure there are many fathers who are more successful than me! 

Academic was never our focus from the very beginning. We understood the importance of teaching values to children, and instilling good habits as early as we can. For instance, during their birthdays, we suggested to them that we use these occasions to help others instead. 

Every year, we would ask the guests not to bring any presents to their parties. Instead, guests can choose to donate any amount to a charity of our choices. We have since helped SOS Dogs, Operation Hope Singapore and World Vision.

That being said, inculcating values is a long journey and we are still trying our best to help them becoming better human being and hopefully they can change the world one day!

- What has been the most significant barrier you've faced as a father or in your profession?

Covid-19 is the single most challenging barrier I have encountered. What I have built up over the years, simply disappeared. Our China branch was almost breaking even but we had to close it. Of course, I could have thrown in the towel or see it as a new opportunity. 

That is how the tour came about. I am experimenting a lot with new concepts during this time, some of which failed, but the point is to never stop trying. Hopefully a few will hit jackpot. I am super excited about the magic tour and so far, the feedbacks are amazing. That is also why I am already working on a 2nd and 3rd magic tour already.

Family relationship

- Who/What inspires you, and why?

Firstly, my father is probably the most humble person who helps other without taking credit for anything. He would give hongbao to the foreign workers during CNY to encourage them. He is still the busiest person I know and juggles them well.

We did not come from a well-to-do family so my father would give tuition at night and take up some freelance accounting jobs while holding a full-time job. On top of that, he volunteers at CCC, RC, my primary school then, and much more.(I lost track frankly.) He is still very active with volunteering and had received the PBM and BBM. 

Secondly, my wife. She is the most understanding person in the world. We hardly quarrel in our 10 years of marriage and she has been my pillar of support.

- What's your personal advice for men on relationships/marriage, raising kids, self-love, career?

Don’t neglect your spouse after you have children. We always make time for each other everyday whether it is over a meal and after the children slept. We have a “don’t blame” culture in the family so this helps for everyone to learn.

Covid-19 is a particularly challenging for us in terms of money but luckily, we never had any dispute over this issue since our marriage. My wife and I naturally step up and pay our expenses when needed and never had to think about who pays what. We do not spend on unnecessary things even before covid-19. Hence our savings and investments now are relatively okay to tide us over now. However, the road ahead is long so we had think of the future and not over spend; our youngest child goes to a non-premium childcare, we eat more at home and hardly visit any restaurant now. 

- What do you hope to change for men and parents/families in general?

Do not focus just on academics! There are many things in life to learn like values. 

- What kind of future do you envision for your kids? 

They are free to choose any career that they want. However, whatever they do, I always remind them to try their best. 

Living in Singapore: Work, Education, Advice for parents

- As a creative person whose work revolves around socially meeting people, how has the pandemic impacted your work and life?

I would compare a face-to-face show and virtual show. Though there is still that interaction, nothing beats that human touch when you meet in person. Things were never the same but we have to get used to it. Even before the pandemic, as I was travelling almost every month, clients would do virtual meetings to discuss so it wasn’t totally fish out of the water. 

I could blame the pandemic, which has taken away a lot of my gigs and my expansion plans or I could embrace it. Rather than being defeated by covid-19, I want to show my resilience by adapting my business. I have pivoted to perform virtual magic show; I believe I was the one of the first in Singapore to do so. I tried to sell decoration packages targeting a worldwide market. I sold magic props and STEM educations kits online. I have done virtual family days during this time for ECDA, STB and CPA Australia.

Of course, we cannot travel anymore. But that does not stop me from writing about the places I had been to in the past. I am amazed to rediscover cool places in Singapore.

I can never stop creating. The magic tour is just one of the things I have come up with during this time combining my 2 passions. I have even made an AR location-based treasure hunt on an app.  Because of the pandemic, I could spend time on my bucket list. I am working on other goals and a lot more ideas I wanted to put out. At the same time, I am relooking at my business and hope to bring in new partners to move my company forward in the long run. 

Just like what my father did, I am trying to set a good example for my children because they will learn by example! 

I also take it as a blessing to spend more time with my family. 

- As a father, education must hold great importance for you. What are your thoughts on the education system in Singapore? Does it need any changes? 

I think many will agree with the recent incidents, the emphasis on teaching values may be lacking. However, I do not think it is totally the school’s responsibility. Though schools have booked me to run magic workshops for their social skill and resilience programme, parents can pay a little more emphasis on their overall growth, and not just solely on academics. The overall mindset has to change to nurture a holistic child than a academically proficient child.

- Which academic programme are your children enrolled in?

My children are in primary school. The only academic programme we are currently doing in Chinese composition. It started out to support my friend and it turned out that they enjoyed it so we continued with it. Majority of the class we enrolled are what they like, eg. music, ballet, swimming, rollerblading and of course, magic lessons. 

- Did you face any challenges getting your children admitted to school? 

We were pretty lucky as my wife is an alumnus from a reputable school so we got in without much stress nor worry. 

It is admirable to see my friends volunteering long hours for their children and I hope their  children will appreciate their parents’ love for many years to come. 

- What is your advice for parents who may be feeling anxious about sending kids back to school?  

Whether it is back to school or work, it is just part of life. It is important to have that social interaction among people. 

Discuss scenarios with your family, which may happen to them and how they may deal with it, prevent them or take it in stride.

I would like to end off this interview with the story of Mr Bottle: 

Once upon a time, there was a very shy child. He was so shy that he did not dare to talk to anyone in school.

One day, his father bought a bottle of magic for him. “In it, is a potion that will make you grow brave and strong.”

Every morning, he would open the bottle for some magic. Day by day, he began to make more friends.

Many years later, he discovered that the bottle was actually empty. Believing in magic has changed his life. This child is none other than Mr Bottle the Magician, who believes that nothing is impossible if you believe in yourself